Anger is about feeling out of control and wanting to gain the control back.
The bodily experience of anger can result in sensations of heat, tightness, pulsation or contraction. Breathing may become heavy or rapid and the heartbeat strong. The mind experience is of narrowing down into very black and white, two-dimensional thinking. The anger is focused outward, directed toward someone or something that is perceived to be ‘causing’ the anger state to exist. Of course Anger is caused by, and reacted upon, the person experiencing the angry state of mind.
After an angry ‘outburst’, there is usually a stage of contrition as the over-reaction is sensed. This can lead to feelings of self-recrimination which are uncomfortable. As a means to escape these uncomfortable feelings there is a tendency to justify anger as caused by external situations, people or events. Blaming others. This just further reinforces the belief that anger exists outside personal responsibility.
Anger creates havoc in personal relationships. Attempts to control others or situations whilst being out of control of one’s self is obviously conflicting and ultimately confusing.
There is also ‘displacement’ anger where the original ‘cause’ of the feelings of upset aren’t expressed in a healthy way. These feelings then fester and accumulate and are projected onto an unrelated incident out of all proportion to the incident itself.
Gaining insight and using strategies to alter responses causes change and new, more fulfilling ways of viewing and experiencing the world can be put in place. Stress free and calm.